


Borrow my heart

by BlackeyedCas (KayrenHikari)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Borrower!Cas, Borrowers AU, Drama, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, human!dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-26
Updated: 2013-12-26
Packaged: 2018-01-06 06:42:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1103669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KayrenHikari/pseuds/BlackeyedCas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Dean moves into the new house he already knows about them. Little people that borrow things from humans. When he starts leaving sugar cubes on the window sill, he has no idea that he is soon about to fall in love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Borrow my heart

They were called ‘Borrowers’. Little people that snuck around the house in the middle of the night, taking little things like sugar cubes and needles, thread and pieces of cheese, little beans and empty matchboxes. They were a little less tall than a matchbox. They were fast, no one ever really saw one but there were rumours, stories about them. And Dean Winchester knew every single one of them.

Every night he left a sugar cube on the window sill and every morning he found it gone. Every night he stayed awake till he was too tired to keep his eyes open, trying to listen if he could hear any footsteps. They would sound like the running of mice, fast and soft against the wooden floor. Too small, too tiny for him to hear in the darkness that played tricks on his mind. He sometimes thought he saw them, running through his room as little shadows, but he was never sure if that actually happened. Maybe it was just his imagination. But... every morning he would wake up, finding the sugar cube gone and instead… a small red rose.

During the day at school he thought about the rose. He tried to imagine who could’ve left it there and made little doodles in his notebook. Small girls with long red hair, wearing dresses made of green leaves, sitting on a thimble. He liked red hair, his ex-girlfriend had red hair. The girl before that had red hair. He drew the girls with roses and tried to imagine her on the windowsill, placing the rose and leaving with the sugar. His teacher had to smack him with a ruler to get him out of his thoughts.

Before he went to sleep that night, he wrote a little note. As small as he could. On it he asked if he could meet the one leaving the roses. And he wished, right before his eyes closed, that he would.

 

~

 

Castiel used the plant, the one that grew outside Dean’s window and reached the first floor of the house, to get inside. He jumped from leaf to leaf, climbed up the stem and then easily pushed the window open to get inside Dean’s warm room. He knew what was waiting for him there. He knew that it was Dean who was leaving the sugar cubes for him.

He had seen the boy when the family moved into the house. He had seen the bright green eyes that seemed to be bored with the countryside. A city boy, too used to tall buildings and cars and other human things that Castiel feared. But the boy was smart too and seemed to recognise the little signs. He seemed to know the few traces the Borrowers left. And soon enough there were the sugar cubes. Castiel didn’t dare to take them the first time. He was afraid that it was a trap but he soon found out that it was safe. For a whole year Dean left him things, once a few things from a dollhouse which Castiel’s family could use. And that was when Castiel fell in love.

He knew it was wrong to fall in love with a human, but he couldn’t help it. The boy was just perfect. Kind, smart and handsome. Castiel often watched him until the sun started to rise. And he decided to bring him something to say thanks. There was no way to show himself to the human. The first time he brought him a random flower from the garden. Then he ran into a rose bush and he ended up giving Dean roses. The boy seemed to like them, because they decorated his room until they dried.

But now there was a note on the windowsill. Castiel at first didn’t dare to look at it, but he was too curious to ignore it. The paper was so neatly folded. So small. The human had tried his best to make it small. He took the paper and unfolded it, finding a messy handwriting inside.

_Hello, my name is Dean._

_Every night I leave you sugar, I hope you like it. Thank you for the roses in return._

_I want to meet you. I wish to. I am not dangerous, I promise I will not capture you. But I want to tell you ‘thanks’._

_It is probably stupid as you are a Borrower and I am a human, but I know a lot about you. So I hope you will trust me._

_-Dean._

Castiel frowned at it. He was raised in the believe that humans were dangerous, that they would capture Borrowers and examine them. Cut them open and put them inside out. He shivered at the memory of the images in his books. Humans were deadly. But Dean. Beautiful and kind Dean. He seemed so different from the humans they were taught about. He wanted to meet him, but he knew what his brothers would say about it.

“Remember Lucifer, brother,” Michael would tell him. To remind him. Yes, Lucifer, Michaels twin brother. He got in contact with humans and it hadn’t ended well. Castiel remembered being small and asking his oldest brother where Lucifer was, when he would return. But Lucifer never did. Still, he believed that Dean was different. Dean felt different, safe. He shook his head and with a pencil that was too big for him, he wrote only one word.

 _Sorry_.

When morning came he prayed, like every other morning. Kneeling besides his matchbox, elbows resting on his blanket and his hands folded in front of his nose. And he prayed to once be able to truly meet Dean Winchester.

 

He woke from the dew in his face. It must’ve been only a few hours later because the sun was still rising and the dew was fresh. He wiped the sleep from his eyes and sat up. Something felt wrong, horribly, terribly wrong. He felt nauseous and cold. Like he wasn’t wearing any… He looked down and his thoughts were right. He wasn’t wearing anything. There was a small stack of really small clothes next to him in the grass and the dew made his skin shiver. The grass. It was small, he couldn’t hide in the blades anymore. His surroundings were different. The trees were smaller, the flowers weren’t just as big as him anymore. He got up, his limbs felt heavy and he got dizzy for a moment. He looked around, again, now searching for something to dress himself with.

Not far from him was a little shack and he ran to it. He didn’t run fast, he was used to having the protection of the grass blades around him, but now he had to keep looking around to be sure he was safe. He found jeans in the shack. An old plaid shirt, dusty from the many years it had been there. He put it on and he felt different in the clothes. Human almost. He ran a hand through his hair, but then he heard something that scared him.

“Yes dad! Fucking hell, I already told you that I will mow the grass today!” It was Dean’s voice. It sounded angry and loud and the boy was on his way to the shack. Castiel wondered what ‘mowing the grass’ and ‘fucking hell’ meant, but he didn’t have time to think about it. The door of the shack opened and there was Dean Winchester, staring at him with a frown. “Who are you?”

“I…” Castiel didn’t know what to say. He was suddenly nervous and sweating. “I am Castiel,” he said with a small voice. He looked down at the floor.

 

~

 

Dean frowned when he found the strange boy hiding in the shack. Dark brown hair stuck out in every direction, bright blue eyes watched him and seemed scared and the boy. The boy was beautiful and mysterious. And so very familiar.

“What are you doing here, Castiel?” he asked. The name felt foreign on his tongue. “I’m gonna call you Cas,” he decided quickly.

“I…” the boy started, but there was something keeping him from replying. Dean couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was. He saw the boy searching for a lie.

“Well, doesn’t matter,” he said before Castiel could speak. “But a shack isn’t really the place to be hiding and I do need to mow the grass.” He grabbed the lawn mower and went outside again. Castiel followed him quickly.

“What does that mean?” he asked with a tiny voice. Dean looked up at him.

“What does what mean?” he replies.

“’Mowing the grass’?” Cas used air quotes and it made him look a bit ridiculous. He tilted his head in a cute way and Dean couldn’t help but stare for a moment. “Dean?”

“Oh, it means I have to cut the grass so it won’t grow too tall. Are you from the city?” Castiel shook his head. “You’re a weird guy.”

 

~

 

Castiel watched while Dean mowed the lawn and he made sure that Dean stayed away from where his little house was hidden. His brothers were probably still asleep. He should’ve been too. He discovered new things in the garden. He watched the iron rooster on the rooftop while it moved in the wind. He ate from the cakes that Dean offered him. And Dean showed him a beautiful black car that the human referred to as ‘baby’. He wondered why humans called cars after newly born infants, but didn’t ask. There was so much to learn about this world. Surprisingly, the car didn’t frighten him at all. Dean offered him a ride in it and Castiel just couldn’t say no.

The ride was just amazing. They were going fast over the black river that Dean called a road and Dean just seemed wanting to go faster. Castiel watched his face for a while until the human stopped somewhere. Castiel looked out of the window and a bit of fear was back in his eyes. They were in the city. He had heard things about the city, but it was so much bigger and so much noisier than he imagined. He looked at Dean.

“Why are we here?” he asked softly. “I do not like this place.”

“It is just the city, Cas. Baby needs gas and I want some pie.” He got out of the car and Castiel let out a soft yelp when Dean opened the door on the passenger side. He didn’t want to leave the safe haven called the Impala. He didn’t want to go outside and be amongst other humans. “Are you coming or what?” Dean asked him. Castiel hesitated and just shook his head. He couldn’t leave the car. Dean just shrugged in reply and disappeared. Castiel heard him fumble with something near the car, then a weird sound followed. He watched when Dean walked into a weird looking house. He closed his eyes for a moment. He really had a lot to learn.

 

~

 

Dean returned with pie and found Cas sleeping on the passenger seat of his car. The boy looked tired, a lot of things seemed new to him which made Dean wonder where this guy was from. Maybe the North Pole, he joked to himself. He got in the car without waking the boy and watched him. His eyes lowered a bit and he found himself looking at Cas’ lips. It wasn’t the first time he was thinking about kissing another guy. His previous relationship had ended with the girl actually being into other girls and it made him think about being gay. Or bisexual. He found himself leaning closer to the boy he had met only hours ago. Closer and closer until his lips brushed the other’s and Cas jolted awake from the touch. Dean pulled back quickly and frowned. He hoped that Cas wouldn’t notice the blush that now coloured his cheeks.

“I got pie,” he quickly said, holding up the bag that had been resting in his lap. “Let’s go back to my home. Where do you actually live?” He started the car and drove back to the road to his house.

“In the forest,” Cas replied and he looked out of the window again. Dean wondered where that was because he often wandered through the forest and never found a house.

“Oh,” he just said. It took them twenty minutes to get back to the house. He parked the car in the garage and looked at the sky that coloured red from the setting sun. “I had fun today, Cas. You’re the first person I met around here. I hope you’ll be around tomorrow?”

“I…” Cas suddenly seemed restless. “I don’t know.” He looked at the sunset and then at Dean again. “I should go. My family will be waking soon.” Dean frowned at that.

“What are you, vampires?”

“What are ‘vampires’?” Cas asked. Dean laughed at that. Cas clearly has no clue.

“Long story. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He took a step to Cas, slowly, nervously, and the boy tilted his head in that too adorable way. “Thank you for today,” he managed to say before he slowly kissed the other. He felt hands push against his chest, then a tug on his shirt and he was drawn closer to Cas. And then there was nothing. Cas had pulled away. He took a step back.

“Thank you,” he said with a small smile on his lips, but Dean felt that it wasn’t a ‘thank you’ for just today. It left him stunned and confused. What Cas said after was what confused him the most. “For the last year.” And then the boy was gone, running into the forest away from Dean. Dean wanted to go after him, ask him what he was talking about, but his confusion froze his muscles and he just stood there for a few minutes before going inside.

 

~

 

After the sun set completely, Castiel was back to normal. He didn’t take the sugar cube the night after, not the night after that. He didn’t want to go and see Dean after the fun they had. It would break his heart if he got reminded that they could never truly be together. A few weeks passed with Castiel collecting berries from the forest and he avoided the house like it was a plague. But another week later he ran into Dean again.

The human boy was searching for something. He was calling out to Castiel, calling his name and clearly searching for a house that wasn’t there.

“Who is that, bro?” Gabriël asked one day when Dean was calling out again. Castiel’s older brother was biting on a piece of sugar. “He knows your name. You two met?” Castiel quickly shook his head. “Liar. Just don’t let Michael find out. He’ll kill you.” Gabriël wasn’t angry at him and it made Castiel relax a bit. Gabriël wasn’t really the type to judge anyone. They watched Dean together from one of the leaves of a tree and Gabriël nodded. “I see why you like him.”

“What do you mean?” Castiel asked and he looked at his brother. Gabriël was somewhat smaller and addicted to sugar. Most of the sugar cubes disappeared to him.

“Well, just look at that ass!” Gabriël smirked and Castiel hit him. “Is he the one that always gives sugar?” Castiel nodded. “Sweet, I should thank him for that.” And before Castiel could blink, Gabriël was running to the human. Castiel cursed and followed him.

 

They found Dean sitting on a tree trunk in the middle of the forest. The human had his face in his hands and his shoulders were slumped a little. He looked like he was giving up. Gabriël snuck closer, but still kept a bit of distance. They were warned to stay away. But Castiel couldn’t stay away. He knew he was hurting Dean. He knew he was breaking Dean’s heart like he was breaking his own.

“Dean?” he asked and the human looked up. He could hear him.

“Cas? Where are you?” Dean asked and Cas stopped in front of him. Dean didn’t see him, he didn’t look at the ground.

“Look…” Castiel started. He still wasn’t sure if he should show himself. “Look down.” Dean did. His eyes widened at what he saw and Castiel didn’t know if he should run or not. He closed his eyes and felt a big hand wrap around him. Gabriël shouted something at him, but he told himself to trust Dean. He opened his eyes when Dean placed him on his other hand. He wasn’t hurting him. He was just looking at him.

“Cas? You’re so small. Damn man. Are you one of those Borrowers?” Castiel nodded slowly. “Wow. Just… wow. Cas, I didn’t know!” Dean couldn’t seem to stop talking. He sounded excited and amazed at the same time. “So are you the one taking the sugar cubes?” Castiel nodded again.

“Yes, although my brother is the one who eats them.” He looked into Gabriël’s direction and that seemed to be the cue for Gabriël to step out of the shadows.

“So your family really does live in the forest.” Castiel nodded again, he never lied. He couldn’t lie to Dean. “You’re small…” Dean looked sad now. And they both knew. They knew that what they had weeks ago, that one day, could never be real. Castiel was a Borrower and Dean was a human. Castiel sat down on the palm of Dean’s hand and he looked up at the face he loved so much. It was like Romeo and Julliet all over again, they could never be together, torn apart by differences. Castiel’s family hated humans and Dean’s family… Castiel didn’t know anything about Dean’s family, but he had seen the mouse traps. He had heard how Dean’s father often yelled at the boy. The floor would tremble from the sound of the man’s voice. And sometimes… Castiel didn’t want to think about it… but sometimes Dean had bruises on his arm in the shape of a hand. It made Castiel fear Dean’s family, but also made him want to hug Dean and keep him safe. But he couldn’t.

“I am sorry,” he mumbled softly, his eyes lowered and his hands folded in his lap. Dean simply shrugged at that, confusing Castiel.

“Why would you be? You miraculously turned big one day and gave me the best day of my life.” There was a hint of pain in his voice. “How did you do that anyway?”

“I do not know.” Castiel turned away and looked down at Gabriël who was listening at their conversation. “I prayed at night and the next morning I was a human.”

“The same happened to Luci,” Gabriël suddenly said and he climbed in a tree to get near Castiel. Lucifer, their brother who had disappeared years ago. Castiel always believed that he was dead, killed by the humans. That was what Michael told them. “He met a human girl and prayed to Father.” Gabriël pointed up at the sky.

“Father?” Dean asked with a frown. “You mean God?” Both Borrowers nodded. “There is no such thing, man.” He put Castiel down on the ground and got up. It was difficult for Castiel to look up at him now, the way Dean towers high above him reminded him even more of the differences. This was what he tried to avoid. The way his heart shattered, the sharp sting in his chest and the tears that welled up in his eyes. He didn’t want Dean to see it. So he turned his back at him. His shoulders shook, he held his fists clenched at his sides. “Cas, come on. I just don’t believe in God. There’s too much crap in this world to believe.” But it wasn’t about that. It was anything but that that made Castiel feel sick. It was everything that Dean was. Different, a human. Tall while Castiel was small. And it made him run away from the human. He just ran. He didn’t look back, ignored Dean who called for him, ignored Gabriël who was right behind him telling him to ‘wait up’. He just couldn’t stand seeing Dean anymore.

 

~

 

Dean didn’t see Cas anymore after that. Learning that Cas was actually a Borrower was weird and confusing, but Dean wasn’t entirely sure if he minded. But Cas had disappeared after they met again, after they talked in the forest. The small Castiel was cute. He had been cute as a human, but the Borrower-Castiel was adorable in his clothes made out of leaves. Dean thought about his notebook with the doodles. He wondered what it would be like to be small like Cas. He thought about his brother who was leaving to Stanford soon. He wondered. Wondered about many things and most included Cas.

That night he sat on his bed and looked out of the window. On the windowsill was a sugar cube with another little note. He wasn’t sure if Cas would come and get it. He looked at the stars and thought about God. Cas and that other guy, Gabriël, believed in God. And if God had made Cas big that one day then maybe… Dean closed his eyes. Praying was weird. It felt like he was talking to himself. And yet it was relieving to tell someone or something about his life. Whatever was up there wouldn’t judge him for anything. He wouldn’t be judged for when he asked his mother to come and look at something while she was cooking. He wouldn’t get the blame for when the potatoes overcooked and the fire licked at the pan. For when the fire caught something else to burn and it had spread fast. Faster and faster it filled the kitchen and his mother had tried to put it out. All he remembered after was that his father was there, telling him to take his brother and run. And Dean blamed himself for his mother’s death. And he knew that sometimes his father did too. And he told God about it. He told God about Cas, about how he had felt alive that one day. And he cried himself to sleep.

 

He woke with something heavy on top of him. It was still dark around him and there was the strong smell of dirty socks. He tried to push the blankets off of him, but he only kicked against whatever was on top of him. He thought he was still dreaming. He crawled to the edge of the bed which was farther away than he thought and he toppled over the edge, falling to the floor. He landed in one of his shoes which was a good thing. He was small, like a Borrower and he could’ve broken something if he had hit the ground. He managed to get out of his shoe and looked around.

“So this is what Cas sees,” he mumbled and he looked up at the window.

“What Cas _saw_ ,” said a voice that came from the cabinet. Dean turned his head and saw Gabriël sitting on a cotton reel. He corrected Dean with a sad look on his face.

“What are you talking about?” Dean tried to climb up to the top of the cabinet, but it was harder than he thought.

“Castiel is gone. He ran off after he met you and he disappeared. We haven’t seen him since.” Gabriël stood, he was still small, but not that much smaller than Dean. “Michael said he’s probably captured or worse…” The word ‘dead’ lingered on his lips and Dean furiously shook his head.

“He can’t be dead!” he shouted and he ran towards the windowsill. It was too far from the cabinet, he couldn’t make the jump. “I need to find him.”

“And how do you want to do that? You are human. And worst of all, naked.” Dean looked down and jumped into a drawer to find something he could wear. All he found was either too big or too pink. He searched and search and Gabriël dropped something on top of him. It was an outfit from one of the dolls from the dollhouse in the attic. It should fit him. He put it on and frowned a little. “You got us sugar, so I owe you, Dean-o. And if you are like us now, it means that my baby bro is still alive.” Gabriël helped him out of the drawer and showed him an easy path to the windowsill.

“Where was he last seen?” Dean asked the Borrower when they were outside. Gabriël pointed towards the forest.

“I’ll show you.”

 

Cas was last seen near a cliff. Gabriël had followed him to the cliff where Cas just disappeared. Gabriël had searched for hours until the sun started to rise. He was heartbroken by it and searched the night after and the night after that. Searched until there was nowhere left to search. He showed Dean where it was and the human boy looked down the cliff. It wasn’t that big, but it looked bigger now that he was small.

Gabriël warned him for the rats. Dean frowned, but didn’t dare to question him. Gabriël warned him for more things, but mostly the rats. They had their holes in the dirt and ate practically everything. Including Borrowers. They took their way down the cliff and passed one of the holes. Dean wanted to look inside, but he knew he shouldn’t. Yet… There was something in there, calling for him. He didn’t know what it was. He took a step closer to the hole and peered inside into the darkness.

“Do you think…” he started softly. “Do you think the rats could’ve taken him?” He looked at Gabriël who couldn’t help but nod. He knew it as well. It was a good possibility. Then Cas was probably dead already. Dean stared at the darkness, hoped that he would see Cas again. Maybe he was in there. He took a step inside and tried to listen for any sounds. Gabriël was protesting behind him, but followed anyway. They could see quite well in the darkness. Better than any human. They followed the tunnel until it split up into tunnels. Dean looked at Gabriël and nodded before choosing the left tunnel. He walked on, deeper into the hole.

 

They found a hole with pieces of plastic, fur and little bones. In the corner was a carcass of some kind of animal and the walls of the hole were covered in mud and clay. They could stand straight up in the hole and Dean feared that the rats were somewhat bigger than expected.

“Gabe?” came a soft voice from the carcass. They walked closer to it to see what it was, but Gabriël’s face told Dean that the Borrower already knew. There, in between the clean ribs, was a boy, sitting in a corner. He was skinnier than Dean remembered and when Cas looked up, Dean could see the shadows under his eyes and cuts on his face and arms. Cas looked horrible and sick. He probably hadn’t eaten anything in days. He looked straight up at Dean, a frown formed on his face. “Dean? Is this heaven?” he asked.

“No, you idiot.” Dean shook his head and a relieved laugh escaped his lips. “Seems like that God of yours likes me.” He took a 360° spin to show Cas his body. The boy said nothing and made himself smaller.

“I wished… I was dead.” Dean froze and stared at him. “The rats… They’ll find me. If I escape… They’ll eat me alive. They are guarding the tunnels and…” Cas fell silent again. “I don’t want to die like that,” he sobbed.

“We’re going to get you out of here.” Dean stepped closer and kneeled before Cas. “I won’t let you die.” He helped him up to his feet and Cas clung to him. He was cold and shivering and light in Dean’s hold. “We’re going home, Cas. You and I. Don’t give up now.”

“Dean, the rats!” Gabriël shouted at him and they heard the little paws in the mud. The sniffing of their noses. And panic hit Dean hard. They had to run, but the rats were coming from the tunnel where they came from themselves. “We’re trapped!” They were indeed trapped. The rats had found them and Cas clung to Dean like a scared child. Dean wasn’t planning to give up so easily. He bent to pick up a bone and pointed it at the rats.

“Stay back!” he shouted. “Gabriël, take Cas! Take him home! I’ll give you some time to run.” He let go of Cas and held the bone with two hands. He swung it around to get the rats’ attention. “Just go!!” And that’s where the rats attacked. The last thing Castiel saw was how one rat jumped on top of Dean, clawing and biting at his throat.

 

~

 

“Gabriël…” Castiel said in a weak voice and he tugged on Gabriël’s shirt. They managed to get out of the hole, but Dean hadn’t come after him. “Where’s Dean?” he asked his brother. “Gabe, where’s Dean?” He saw how Gabriël looked back to the hole and then shook his head. Castiel started to feel afraid. If Dean was still inside, if he hadn’t won from the rats… Castiel didn’t want to lose Dean. “Find him, Gabe. Find him!”

“We can’t, baby bro. We can’t go back in there. I told him I’d take you home. And I will.”

“No! NO! Dean!” Castiel fought against Gabriël’s hold, but his older brother was stronger than him. He couldn’t get away. He couldn’t go back to Dean.

They waited in the shadows for what felt like hours and after Castiel almost fell asleep, Gabriël said that he saw movement in the tunnel. Castiel looked up from the bushes where they were hiding. There were still tears in his eyes. Dean was just the only friend he ever had. He was the only distraction from his broken family. He watched the movement in the tunnel and then a flash of green was visible. Green eyes. Blond hair. Dean.

Dean stumbled out and fell face first in the dirt. He stopped moving, his whole body froze and he was bleeding. He was fully covered in blood. Gabriël let go of Castiel and ran to Dean. Castiel followed him quickly. They knelt besides him and Castiel let out a yelp when he saw how badly Dean was hurt.

“Cas…” Dean looked up at him through half open eyes. “You okay…?” His voice was soft and he was trembling. Castiel nodded quickly. “Good… You… are my friend, Cas… Couldn’t let you… die…” His voice got weaker. “I’m sorry… Cas…” he stammered softly. His hand went up to touch Castiel’s face, but fell back to the ground before he could reach it. “Your world… Wish I’d seen…. More…” He coughs. His chest was ripped open by the rats’ claws and there were bite-marks in his throat. “Say Cas…”

“Don’t speak, Dean. We’ll get you home. I promise. Don’t speak.” Cas grabbed Dean’s hand and squeezed it. “Please.”

“I… really… like you. And… I wish…” He couldn’t finish his sentence. His whole body relaxed and his eyes fell shut. Castiel shouted at him, ordered him not to die, but Dean didn’t open his eyes anymore. He was gone.

 

They took him to their house and Gabriël explained what happened to Michael. Michael didn’t agree with bringing a human into their home, but Dean had saved their youngest brother. They placed the human boy on Castiel’s bed and even though they had already given up on him, they still cleaned his wounds. Castiel washed Dean’s clothes and dressed him in something else. Something of his own. Dean looked like them. No longer like a human in a doll’s outfit.

Michael and Gabriël left him alone with Dean. Castiel sat on a chair and watched his friend. His hands folded almost automatically and his eyes closed. One more prayer. One last prayer. He had prayed every single night, right before he went to bed, asking for a friend. And Father had given him a friend. Even though it was only for a very short time.

“Cassy, you should eat something,” Michael said the next morning. Castiel had fallen asleep in the chair and his oldest brother gently shook him awake. He gave him a plate with some berries and bread. "Go to the living room to eat. You should take your mind off him for a moment. You are killing yourself.” The younger shook his head at first, but then left for the living room. He found Gabriël on the couch and sat next to him, eating in silence.

Michael looked at Dean. He sat down in the chair.

“You should wake up, you know,” he said and reached out to place two fingers on Dean’s forehead. A warmth spread through the boy’s body and green eyes fluttered open. “This is my thanks. Don’t expect more.” He got up and for a moment there was the shadows of wings on the wall. “Take care of Castiel. If you hurt him I will kill you.” Dean nodded slowly.

“Will I stay like this?” he asked. Michael looked back at him.

“Do you wish to?”

“I wish to stay with Cas. I wish to see the world the way you see it. Castiel makes me happy.”

“Then you will.” And Michael walked back to the living room. He didn’t say a word to Castiel, but Castiel knew. He shot up and ran back to his bedroom. Dean was alive. Dean was there, sitting up straight in the bed, looking at the things Castiel collected in his time as a Borrower.

“Do you like it?” Castiel sat down next to him. He had to keep himself from hugging Dean. The human boy nodded. “I thought you were dead.” Castiel’s voice was very soft. Dean wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer to him. Castiel could feel his warmth, he relaxed a little.

“I think I was. But your brother…” Dean looked at the door. “I saw something on his back.” His fingers ran over Castiel’s shoulder blades. “They looked like wings.” Castiel just nodded. He knew about the wings, about who they really were. He didn’t tell Dean about it.

“Will you stay?”

“I don’t have much choice now, do I?” Dean leaned closer to Castiel and kissed him softly. “I wish to stay.”

“But… your family.” Castiel thought about Dean’s father. “They won’t see you again.”

“Sammy, my little brother,” he started. “He can take care of himself. And perhaps I’ll leave him a flower too. Like you did.” Castiel smiled, the smile warmed his chest and perhaps even glued the pieces of his once broken heart together. “And now you are my little angel.” Dean kissed him again and Castiel thought that maybe, very maybe, Dean knew more than they all thought.

 

In the end they built their own little house in the forest. Michael and Gabriël helped them and within a few days of working hard they were all sitting around the dining table enjoying freshly picked berries and some tea. In the last few days Dean had learned a lot about the family that was actually bigger than just Michael and Gabriël. Castiel had more brothers and even a few sisters. Dean often visited his old house and watched his brother Sam study for Stanford. He left little notes wishing him good luck. He missed him, but Castiel was now his life.

They were in bed together after Michael and Gabriël left and Castiel played a bit with a small feather. Dean watched him. So much happened in the last year and he was grateful for everything. And that night was his last prayer to the God he thought he never believed in.

_Thank you._

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo I wrote this after I drew a little Castiel in my notebook and I just had to write a fic about it. (At least I now did something useful this Christmas). I hope you enjoyed it!
> 
> (I am blackeyedcas on Tumblr)


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